第四百三十三章 世上只有媳妇儿好
第四百三十三章世上只有媳妇儿好(第1/2页)
李山河：？？？
双手抱头蹲在地上、牙关紧咬准备硬扛这顿“皮带炒肉”的李山河，一听这话，气得差点一口老血喷出来！牙咬得咯嘣响！这小瘪犊子！
惹了祸玩火烤家雀儿，捅了篓子，这会儿居然拿他当挡箭牌？
这是嫌你哥活得太长了啊，还要火上浇油啊！他恨不得立刻跳起来把这黑炭头弟弟也按地上摩擦！
李卫东扬起的皮带也是一顿，被小儿子这“神来之笔”噎得差点岔气！他看看地上抱头装可怜的老二，又看看脚边抱着脑袋装鹌鹑的老三，额头青筋暴跳，一时间竟不知这皮带该先抽哪个混账玩意儿！
“爹！消消气！”
“爹！使不得！”
两道清亮又带着焦急的女声同时响起！
田玉兰挺着微隆的肚子，快步上前，一把就扶住了李卫东那只握着皮带的胳膊。
她声音温婉却带着不容置疑的力道：“爹！爹是高兴糊涂了！您看，莲姐这不是好好的？大喜的日子，可不能动气伤身啊！吓着孩子！”她说着，目光关切地看向吴白莲的小腹。
吴白莲也反应过来了，顾不得害羞，几步上前，直接伸手就抓住了李卫东手里的皮带另一端！
她性子比田玉兰更爽利些，急声道：“爹！您要打就打我！是我没站稳！不关当家的事！您这皮带要是落下来，吓着您孙子孙女，我可…我可跟您急！”她这话带着点撒娇的嗔怪，眼神却异常坚定。
两个儿媳妇，一个温言相劝，一个“以子相胁”，左右夹击。
李卫东那冲天的怒火，被这柔情攻势一浇，再看着两个儿媳妇护犊子的架势，尤其是吴白莲那护着小腹的动作，高高扬起的皮带终究是没落下来。
他重重地“哼”了一声，手腕一抖，“啪”地把皮带收了回来，重新系回腰上，对着还蹲在地上的李山河怒骂：“小兔崽子！看你媳妇的面子！再有下次，老子把你腿打折！”骂归骂，那眼神里的火气却消了大半。
李山河一听警报解除，立刻从地上弹起来，那变脸速度比翻书还快！刚才还一脸视死如归，瞬间就换上了嬉皮笑脸。
他一把搂住离他最近的吴白莲，也不管旁边还有老爹老娘爷爷弟弟妹妹，嘴跟抹了蜜似的：“要不还得说的是两口子呢，遇上事儿了还得是靠媳妇啊！世上只有媳妇好！没媳妇的孩子像根草！莲姐！你就是我的救命菩萨！媳妇！你也是！”
他还不忘冲田玉兰也抛了个感激的飞眼儿。
“呸！”王淑芬在旁边看得是又好气又好笑，白眼都快翻到天上去了，忍不住啐了一口，“油嘴滑舌这个熊样儿！我看是刻在你们老李家老爷们儿骨头缝儿里的！祖传的！从你爷到你爹再到你，没一个好东西！”
她这话把旁边刚收起烟袋锅的老爷子李宝财和刚系好皮带的李卫东都捎带上了。
老爷子尴尬地咳嗽一声，背着手踱到一边去了。李卫东也摸了摸鼻子，没敢吱声。
李山河是高兴了，劫后余生，还双喜临门，美得冒泡。
（本章未完，请点击下一页继续阅读）第四百三十三章世上只有媳妇儿好(第2/2页)
可有人天塌了！
李山峰！
这小机灵鬼刚才还抱着脑袋，满心以为靠着“二哥挡箭牌”的神操作能逃过一劫，正暗自得意呢。
结果呢？两个嫂子一出马，二哥屁事儿没有！皮带没落下来！那接下来…不就轮到他了吗？！
李山峰那张黢黑的小脸瞬间垮了，眼神里的光“唰”地灭了，小肩膀也耷拉下来，感觉整个世界都灰暗了。
他眼神空洞地看着他二哥搂着媳妇傻乐，再看看他爹虽然收了皮带但依旧不善的眼神，还有他妈那虎视眈眈、仿佛在掂量用笤帚疙瘩还是擀面杖更顺手的表情…
李山峰：这下完犊子了…二哥有媳妇救命…我…我啥也没有啊！呜…以后！以后我一定要像二哥一样！多娶几个媳妇！越多越好！要是挨揍了就让媳妇救！一个不够就两个！两个不够就…
在这一刻，十岁的李山峰，那朴素的、关于“媳妇等于免揍金牌”的信念，前所未有的坚定起来！虽然这信念的根基，充满了对即将到来的混合双打的深刻恐惧…
“爹，妈，”田玉兰适时地打破了这诡异的气氛，她温声询问还带着点余怒的李卫东和王淑芬，“您二老刚从姥姥家回来，还没吃饭吧？正好，莲姐炸了好些老家贼=，还热乎着呢，进屋吃点垫垫？”
“对对对！进屋吃点儿！”李山河也赶紧附和，想转移火力。
吴白莲一听“进屋”，脸色又有点发白，那股熟悉的恶心感隐隐往上涌，她强忍着，苦笑道：“大姐…那屋…我怕是进不去了，一闻那油味就想吐…”
田玉兰立刻明白了：“瞧我，忘了这茬。爹，妈，咱去老房吃吧？老房清净，没油烟味儿。让琪琪格和萨娜把菜端过去，再热点苞米茬子粥，暖暖和和吃点。”
“行！听玉兰的！”王淑芬拍板，瞪了一眼还在做白日梦的李山峰，“老三！还杵着当门神呢？麻溜儿滚去老房摆桌子去！”
李山峰一听“老房”，又暂时没提挨打的事，那颗悬到嗓子眼的心，“噗通”一声，暂时落回肚子里一半。
他如蒙大赦，赶紧应了一声：“哎！”小短腿倒腾得飞快，第一个就朝隔壁老房蹿去，仿佛后面有狼撵。
琪琪格和萨娜手脚麻利，把堂屋炕桌上那大盘金黄油亮的炸家雀儿，还有温着的酒壶、几样小咸菜，连同碗筷一起，用大托盘端着，送到了老房的炕桌上。
萨娜还特意去灶房生了火，热上了一锅苞米茬子粥，灶膛里的火光映着她冻得有点通红的手。
老房的土炕也烧上了，虽然不如新房热乎，但也驱散了寒意。
一家人围坐在老房的炕桌前，气氛总算缓和下来。
李山峰缩在炕梢，努力降低存在感，小口小口啃着一只炸雀儿，眼睛滴溜溜乱转，观察着爹妈的脸色。
嗯，爹在喝酒，妈在给爷夹菜…好像暂时忘了揍他的事？他心底下那另一半也快落回去了，甚至有点小窃喜，看来这顿打…能混过去？
一秒记住【顶点小说】
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